The Hoof is on Fire

Game 1

Sean: Phylath | Ryan: Walls | Keegan: Atla | Alex: Korvold

First game of the night we saw three decks that want to go fast, and one that is a slow value engine. Ryan had a target on his back coming into this week by two people, for two entirely different reasons. Keegan wanted to close the gap, Alex was salty about the previous week lmfao. Started off with no mulligans around the table and surprisingly Alex won the turn 1 roll.

Alex had a very good opening hand, curving a Spawning Pit into an Awakening Zone. The Zone was very nice, but Alex’s brain is very smooth, and missed a lot of triggers for it. He had an early game Parallel Lives to pair with it, and just Mickletited on the triggers. Being on the play with Korvold at a table full of decks that want to ramp and dump, it helped level the field reasonably. He Spent the game beating down Ryan with a solo Korvold, he was out for blood and his board was the largest threat.

Speaking of, Ryan was able to get a lot of key pieces out very fast. A Worldly Tutor for an Overgrown Battlement had Alex befuddled, but his confusion was answered on the next turn when he dropped the ultimate mana dork, Axebane Guardian. He was extremely setup to be an unstoppable force by finding key support pieces like Spidersilk Armour and Brave the Sands, but he also was able to resolve and stick a win con in Tetsuko Umezawa very early on. He was quickly beating down Alex to return the damage, but by turn 5 or 6 was setup to close the game in the next turn or two.

Having Atla run by their creator is a true ass fear for the table. There is always some ol’ Kentucky Windage when it comes to decks, and Atla pays off those who know how to play and what to keep in the opener. Keegan had a very early sac outlet in Goblin Bombardment, as well as (I believe) an on curve Blasting Station. A Samut, Voice of Dissent made an appearance, but I cannot remember much past that for him.

Last but not least to discuss is Phylath, with Sean driving him. Sean said “I know how to play lands”, and Alex was confused when he did not see a T1 Manabond. But all jokes aside, Phylath did the perfect under the radar play. It had a bit of ramp, but was not sticking many creatures early on. I believe Phylath came out on curve, but was not on the tables radar due to Ryan and his legion of unblockable walls.

The table was beating each other down, and the damage was ramping up big time due to the walls having vigilance. It seemed like Ryan was going to be able to close the, but then Phylath found it’s good friend Craterhoof Behemoth, which won on the swing. Sean not being interacted with had left his creature count big with a couple plants looking very beefy pre pump.

Sean swung out and swiftly ended the game for the table, securing a very clean W.

Craterhoof Wins: 1/1

Game 2

Sean: Atla | Ryan: Zacama | Keegan: Phylath | Alex: Hapatra

For the first time we see the “casual” Zacama deck make an appearance in league. This deck was built by Keegan to be a fun casual deck, but it is ramp tribal with the win condition in the command zone. It was one of the most oppressive casual decks I have played against, and if left alone, it hits the field and gives us all a nice Chicago Sunroof. Such a race against the clock, and a shining example of building around the commander.

Ryan, Keegan, and Sean all took a free mulligan. Alex was won a roll off against Sean and again took T1.

Sean was glad to be running Atla, and he again had the Blasting Station in the opening hand. I believe that he had missed a land drop for a turn or two which had delayed Atla coming down on time. He dies with Atla and an Egg on the field. Important info to remember.

Ryan was able to hit some extremely nasty early game pieces for Zacama. He had a super fucked up Summer Bloom which resulted in a 4 land drop turn on T2. He was setup to start clapping cheeks early on. He died with nothing on the board.

Phylath this game was piloted Keegan, and was ramping up some action prior to his death. But he did not have a ton of action prior to it. Was not hitting the same level of ramp into wincon that Sean had the game before.

Hapatra was again present at the table, and piloted by her creator (and waifu aficionado) Alex. He kicked it off with a Young Wolf, which has synergy with -1/-1 counters in general, but is a full blown combo with Yawgmoth, Thran Physician. He ran out Hapatra next turn, then a Nest of Scarabs. The true nut draw came around T4 when Alex resolved a Fynn, the Fangbearer. That was essentially the end of the game right there, he finished off Ryan with poison before he was able to open up the throttle and get Zacama down and killing his pingers. On his next turn, Alex drove 5 deathtouchers at Sean, who ate it to the face. He did not read the card, and lost with an egg and Atla up. These things happen, and we will see a top tier fuck up from Alex next game. Next turn, Alex dropped in a Craterhoof and swung out at Keegan, finishing him off.

For the first time since 2/1/22, Alex got a non-2HD win.

Craterhoof Wins: 2/2

Game 3

Sean: Obuun | Ryan: Torens | Keegan: Muldrotha | Alex: Emmara

We again saw no mulligans around the table, and Sean won the die roll to go on the play.

Sean was able to get some early game play going, some nice ramp and was hitting the necessary fetch lands. Had a nice early Rites of Flourishing which was great for a moment, but ruined by Keegan flashing in a Notion Thief at the end of turn. Keep this in mind, it is relevant later. His game plan was going smooth until Ryan got out a Thalia, Heretic Carhar, which shut down the ability to continually snap off fetch lands. Such a mean creature Thalia is.

Speaking of which, Ryan was able to get out a very strong T1. He went Land –> Sol Ring –> Throne of the God-Pharaoh. This was instantly met with Alex telling him that he has an Aura Shards in hand (shows them) and is going to blow up his pieces. Ryan attempted to slowball an Aura Mutation once the Shards came out, but Keegan faded that with a pitched Force of Will. This really slowed Ryan down losing both a pinger and a source of mana. He did not hit much ramp, and we eventually saw a Heronblade Elite. But it was too late at that point.

Elated to be playing Emmara, and seeing an Aura Shards in hand, Alex kept a pretty bunk hand. He did not have any hardcore enablers in hand, but was able to find a Parallel Lives and Cryptolith Rite pretty early. Aura Shards stuck to the board, and controlled the board, but was not overly oppressive. He was able to make some tokens, but not enough fast enough with a payoff truly. There was a time where Alex blew up Sean’s Rites, which in his brain was allowing Keegan to draw each turn (so smooth brained). This resulted in him casting a Collective Unconscious for 5, which with Thief out, was just a draw 5 for Keegan. Such a dumbass, but he wants to note that Ryan was thinking the same as him at the time lol. But he was still elated to pilot his favorite Selesnya commander.

Muldrotha was out of the bog and into our pod. Being a very hit or miss deck, he was ready to slip under the radar. And he did so very much. Keegan did not hit a lot of board presence, and the other three drawing each other’s attention let him setup very well. Being a big drop, you need to be in a position to control or win on the untap, and he did end up doing that. I truly do not know how Keegan was able to build up such a board, but he was relatively well represented when, you guessed it, a Craterhoof came stomping through the woods. It was a very surprising win, but well done truly. There was some misunderstanding of priority with a Baleful Mastery, but eventually it landed on a recently summoned Obuun lol.

Craterhoof Wins: 3/3

Game 4

Sean: Muldrotha | Ryan: Hapatra | Keegan: Shrines | Alex: Zur

Yes folks, we turbo’d out 3 games in 2 hours thanks to our god The Hoof. So we all decided to run another game, and The Hoof was not pleased. She was a grindy one. A notable piece of this game is that it was Zur’s first appearance in league. It recently got a build change (before he showed his face), into being a more counter/control based build. Alex did not see this side of Zur to say the least. But Zur is a fucking menace in free-for-all, but he is most lethal (in my novice opinion) in 2HD.

Sean again won the die roll, and we saw a free mully from Sean, who then had a Shandalar Mulligan which Ryan joined in on.

This game, as many would guess, was such a grind fest. Once Zur came out he was able to double his triggers thanks to Strionic Resonator. He swiftly setup an attack lock with Web of Inertia and Rest in Peace. He also had an All the Glitters and Ethereal Armour, plus a Steel of the Godhead on Zur very fast. He also found a Solemnity to shut down Hapatra, plus he used a Grasp of Fate to eat a Fynn, Sanctum Weaver, and a Rhystic Study. Alex was gaining life like a boss, until Sean started procuring information about if Zur had shroud or hexproof. This sent Alex into a state of panic. So instead of getting a card that granted it, he got a Timely Ward. This resulted in Zur getting enchanted by Sean with a Freed from the Real, and kept Zur tapped the rest of the game. Alex’s fear of voltron came true due to his own idiocrasy.

Beyond his gigabrain play, Sean was not able to do much past the early game due to the Rest in Peace. Funny to think that a deck that relies on it’s graveyard is bad against that? The most notable piece was the he got out a Lord of Extinction, which got killed in a trade against a snake. Unfortunately this was too disgraceful and was sent to exile shortly after. But what a cool ass card. He also had a Nyxbloom Ancient stick and was able to do nothing with it but tap down Zur. He did complain about his lands turning into non-sacing Black Lotus‘s, which was hilarious.

Hapatra was able to get some early action and was quickly building up a nasty board before it was shut down by Zur. If she can’t attack and she can’t use counters, that deck sucks. Shutting off the commander shuts off the deck. Who woulda guessed? Ryan had a very questionable Craterhoof with a huge pump but no swing at Sean (only lethal target). He gave his creatures +20/20 and did nothing. Very sus. But I will come back to Ryan, and how I believe had the win, at the end.

Lastly, we have Shrines. Which honestly does not need much to talk about it. It did exactly what was expected, it tutored up shrines. An early Sanctum of Fangs allowed some draw. Post game I talked to him about it, and he was confused why I did not pull out Tainted Remedy. I honestly saw it as a bonus to the board due to it draining everyone, while I was gaining lots of life at the time. Essentially Keegan won the game by draining everyone on double triggers off Sanctum of All, then finishing off Alex with a sacrifice of 31 spirits to a Goblin Bombardment. I do not know what shrines did it, but what I do remember is that Keegan is very anti-proxy.

Craterhoof Wins: 4/4 3/4

Note about Ryan

I believe that Ryan had a T1 Worldly Tutor which he got Fynn with. I believe that lost him the game. He had a T5 win in theory. He could have went:

T1: Worldly Tutor –> Get Yawgmoth

T2: Hapatra

T3: Nest of Scarabs (he had it) –> Attack Alex with Hapatra –> Make Snake and Insect

T4: Yawgmoth

T5: Draw half your deck with Yawgmoth sacrificing an Insect and putting a -1/-1 on a Snake making 2 more. Use your 4 or 5 mana and half deck to get out a Zulaport Cutthroat or a Blood Artist and combo drain us on T5.

Even with the x=4 Green Sun Zenith, Solemnity wasn’t out and you had Yawgmoth on the table to end us.